Benevolent and More Loving

The Self-Actualizer is munificent.  They are sociable, gracious, and affectionate to most people around them. They have a delightful way about them making others feel at ease and in awe of their benevolence.  However, the Self-Actualizer is careful as to whom they allow in their inner circle and they typically only have a few close personal relationships in which they uphold a strong and deep connection. These bonds that they form with others are rich and are typically with other Self-Actualizers or people who are demonstrating the capacity to become Self-Actualizers.  Those close to them are loved with an intensity that feels more intense, because most people cannot conceive their selflessness in which they give of themselves, and most people are in awe of this attribute. 

The Self-Actualizer is not a jealous or possessive lover, what they love is the nature of things, its essence and core.  This way of loving Maslow would say is “being-Love” (B-Love).  In B-Love the gift for the Self-Actualizers is in the sole pleasure of being able to give.  The reward for the Self-Actualizer is in being able to express love.  Self-Actualizers do not feel threatened by the success of loved ones, but become overjoyed for them and will do what they can to help make this happen if they can.  What these individuals find attractive in other people is their character, over physical attributes.  In sexual relationships, they would prefer to practice celibacy, over having sex without love and intimacy.  The meaning of love, the feeling of love in an intimate partnership is something that they value.